Are you tired of groups of swarming people? Long hard work days? being hounded by colleagues and co-workers? Are you over stressed and under pressure and is everyone vying for your attention? Do you find people don't take you seriously anymore? Try new and improved Pink Eye! Thats right folks, Conjunctivitis! With this lovely little infection no one will want to be near you. You'll be pressed to take the day off from whatever job you have and you can easily excuse yourself from any hefty social obligations. Not to mention the unsettling nature of your new menacing red eye will make people not only listen to you but fear you in a similar way one might fear a rabid dog or an overly large spider. But thats not all, you can also use the green gooey stuff that drips out of your eye at frequent intervals as a great adhesive for small household fixes!